Mga Balahura

alam kung hi-tech na tayo. pero grabe hinayupak kang genius ka sa kumpyuter kung sino ka man na nang-kack ng account ko Putangina mo!

kaya ngayon nag re encarnate akong muli sa facebook

I dont have any idea why for 3 years i keep my persistence to keep myself writing in this piece of crap. maybe I just want an escape to my vauge life, maybe i wanted a medium to express myself, maybe Im waiting for somebody to read my writings and comment "hey,i can relate on you" . everything was maybe, I dont even know how to answer my own question Or maybe I want to stop the questins just because im afraid on the answers.

im not being melodramatic but i do know for some reasons that there are holes on me, I just dont fit on anywhere else , with anybody, that's one downside of me being a sugar-coater. and for some reason im very much decided to make a restraint on this blog, this could be a little hard for me since this is has been a huge part of my history. but i do want to have a change and take a look on what is waiting for me outside the net. (it will be months.........again)

i just want to leave this to who ever person who happens to be reading this,

" life is short, i should know that for so many reason. you may be on pain or you may be sad,

its fine to fall down and cry. but never ever attempt to just coat your problems with a fake smile

cause it will pool your emotions and make everything a lot worse, again i know that for so many reason. some people will not like you, it would be painful but you should not care at all. cause you my friend is who you want to be and not what others want you to be. never take your life, ive attempted it and for some reason im still here, which means its not the solution.

cry, that is good for you . scream would be better , and afterwards .........go out there and do your own thing."

thats it for now.

manhid na ba ako?

kanina nanood ako ng vampire diaries, ang ganda shet, nag-alab ulit ang dugo ko, nabuhay ulit yung mga tinatago kong suicidal feelings .... bat' ang mga bampira kahit spiritually dead na sila eh nakakaramdam parin sila , kum baga may feelings pa rin, pain, lust, happiness......walang biro maraming beses ko na rin inatemp na magpakamatay. na-isip kong mag-bigti, pero base sa mga napapanood ko ang panget mu pag bangkay ka na, at ayokong mamatay ng panget, ayokong mamatay na dilat at labas ang dila with tulo laway pa. na-isip ko ring mag-laslas pero shet 0.1% lang ang mortality rate nyan, gusto ko sure hit, kumbaga dapat jackpot. habang nag-sosolo ako sa bahay trip-trip kong mag-luto-luto , shempre as an amateur nahiwa na rin ako, at di ko kinaya ang pain, kaya erase na sa mind ang kutsilyo. habang tumatanda kaming mag-kakapatid mas lumuluwang na ang control nina mama at daddy saming mag-kakapatid, dito sa bahay may dalawang nakakalat na baril hindi ko sure kong ano yung isa basta mahaba yun , at yung isa naman is revolver yung pang Russian roulette ng mga cowboy, naisip ko ring gamitin yang mga letseng baril na yan, as in tinutok ko sa hawak-hawak ko na sya, pero nanginig ako. hindi ko kaya. oo ngayon marami akong problema, nasasaktan ako,nahihirapan ako, umiiyak ako, pero hindi ko kaya. takot ba ako? hindi. hindi ako takot na tumagos ang bala sa akin hindi ako takot mamatay. hindi ako masaya ngayon, hindi ako sigurado kung gaano pa katagal akong masasaktan,hindi ako sigurado kung kaya ko pa bang tumagal sa sakit, ang sigurado ko lang sa ngayon ay gusto ko ng matigil ang sakit. pero ayoko pang umalis.

I

as death comes near me

I whisper to my ears

a sweet symphony

cradling me into a juvenile glee

a juvenile peace I've been awaiting to see

yeah, I've been worst than bad

and it chills me

and it pushes me to my grave

after i shut my eyes and shed my tears

I laugh

I sigh

and I said to myself

Im not sorry

Im bad and Im bleeding glitters

im so into emo mode

-------hibernation-------

Gulo

gulong gulo ngaun ang mga braincells ko.

sa hindi ko maipaliwanag na pang-yayari , bigla nalang umuwi ang hampaslupa kong workless/tambay na kapatid na nurse (je3 jowk lang) dito sa ilokos. ewan ko ba sa babaitang igorot na yan, matapos ba namang mag-aral na apat na taon ng nersing sa maynila. eh mas gusto ba namang magtrabaho bilang kahera sa jolibee. punyemas. sabagay hindi ko sha masisi dahil talaga namang madugo ang trabaho ng mga nurses ngaun dito sa pilipinas, bukod sa pahirapan na ang paghahanap ng trabaho ay kailangan mo pang mag-volunteer w/o salary(kaya nga volunteer dba?, duh ! ) kung sakaling payagan ka ng hospital, letseng mga hospital yan, ke choosy ha!.

At kung sakaling payagan ka namang mag-volunteer ay punyemas wala kang gagawin sa walong oras mung shift kundi mag-regulate ng swero buong araw. oh kaya'y mag-drain ng mga ihi ng mga pashente, maglinis ng sugat , oh kaya'y ishave ang bulbul ng mga magpapatanggal ng mattres . hindi naman sa pang-iinsulto sa mga kaliga kong nurses, ngunit dadaptwa gayun-paman sa kabilang dako ng libo-libong isla ng pilipinas kailangan na talaga nating pigilan ang mga magulang natin sa pamimilit at pagtuturture sa kanilang mga anak para lang makumbinse nilang mag-nursing sila.

ako, honestly katulad rin ako ng kapatid kong maitim na pinilit lang ng isang boung angkan namin para lang mag-nursing, ikaw ba naman ang bigyan ng ganitong option.

A. mag-nursing ka , promise wala ka ng gagawin sa bahay.

B. wag kang mag-nursing,wag ka nang mag-aral

C. punyemas, lumayas ka na sa harap ko.

shempre, no choice ang lolo nyo. napa cge na nga ako. at dun na nagsimula ang kalbaryo ko. je3.

mahirap talaga ang nursing, yun ang totoo. wag na tayong mag-pakaimpokrito. ikaw ba naman ang magbasa nang pagka-kapal kapal na Punda, Patho,MatAndChi,Pedia,MedSurg at kung anik-anik pang libro, ewan ko nalang kung dka tubuan ng mga pimpols na sing laki ng nunal ni madam gloria.susmarya! pero habang tumatagal, wala ng nagawa pa ang mga braincells ko at na-invade na sila ng aking malaking puso. at napamahal na sakin ang aking prrrrrrropessssyyyun. (iw).

anyways, yun nga umuwi ang babaitang kapatid ko, since taga-maynila na sya,at ako probinsyano. nasulsulan nya akong bumili ng ipod touch dahil antigo na raw ang ipod nano ko. hay putangina. wala na akong nagawa dahil sa mga oras na ito, nasa central nervous system ko na si luciper at gustong-gusto ko nang bumili ng ipod touch, ju3 inis-na-inis talaga ako sa kapatid kong to, may sa demonyo yata at ang galing makipag salestalk. anyways yung pera kong pambili ng ipod touch ay ipon ko talaga para sa bago kung laptop. sa kasawiang palad, kailangan ko munang i-delay ang laptop for 1 more year. hay.

sha nga pala, gusto ko lang itanong,na try mu na bang ma-inlove sa love ng kaibigan mu(oh sige actually hindi pa love, siguro like lang) so yun nga, yung like mo karelasyon ng kaibigan mu. at ang masaklap pa dun, ikaw ang nagsulsul sa like mo na ligawan ang kaibigan mu. dumating nalang ang araw na narealize mu na like mu na pala siya. well masakit yan brad. alam mu kung bakit? kasi yan ang situation ko ngaun. hay(buntung hininga) sana lumipas na to. anyways happy parin ako at sobrang excited sa aking ipod touch. je3.

gudbye muna goldie.

dahil sa mga kagaguhang ginawa ng mga kagrup kong nursing students na pagtatago sa selpon ko na inakala kung nanakaw, na sa kasamahang palad ay nagdulot ng malaking kahihiyan sakin at malaking problema sa isang tricycle driver na pi-na-blotter ng mga mapag-mahal kong mga magulang dahil sa pag-a-a-kalang sha ang nag-nakaw ng aking mamahaling high-end na selpon(ang yabang....char!) napagdesisyonan ko sa tulong ng aking panaginip na hinahabol ako ng isang karo ng patay, dapat ko nang i-set-free si goldie.

sino si goldie?

si goldie ang mamahalin kong selpon , makinis pa sha hanggang ngaun, kulay ginto at black na samsung, iisa palang ang gasgas nya na super liit as in microscopic lang na gasgas. binili ko yung selpon na yun bilang regalo ko sa sarili ko nang mag-caping and pinning ako nung third year , sa makatuwid wala pang anim na buwan sa akin si goldie. sa tuwing nilalabas ko ang selpon ko habang naglalakad at nagtetext sa hallway ng aming school lahat ng mata ay nakatitig sa kanya. kumbaga sha ang ladygaga ng mga selpon sa school.

maraming beses na ring muntik maghiwalay ang aming landas ni goldie. isang beses ay noong nasa tutuban ako. sa harap ng tutuban mall ay maraming kainan , at dun muntik hambalusin ng isang kargadur ang bag ko para lang makuha si goldie. mabuti nalang at mukha akong anghel at nakuntento nalang yung lalaki sa aking alindog( alindog kajan?!).

pero seryuso ako. aminin na natin ang mga iilang magagandang bagay sa mundo ay talagang mainit sa mga mata ni snatser. magnanakaw . mandurugas . luciper atbp. kung kaya naman napagdesisyonan ko nang i-set-free si goldie, kahit masakit sa aking esopagus ay papakawalan ko na sya upang hindi na muling malagay sa peligro ang aking buhay (wow!, lovestory?)

sa halip na mag-mukmuk ako at lumuha ay nag-google nalang ako at nagblog-hop at dun ko nakita ang aking bagong mahal.(online live story . je3)

sana po ay huwag nyo shang husgahan.

huwag nyo namang sabihin na kaypanget ng ipinalit ko kay goldie.

eto po sya, ang kanyang pangalan ay si

BLACKY

okey, fine ang panget nya talaga,

pero

ika nga ng kasabihan.

humanap ka ng panget at hindi ka iiyak.

how a prank turn into a colonial melancholia

it was a then ordinary day, i woke up early, went to school early, and i texted some of my friends good-morning then i place my phone beside me, i was still sleepy and so groggy that time, i wasn't fully awake. for split seconds i fell asleep , i guessed. caused after i opened my eyes my phone is totally gone. and i was like, ok this is a pranks, where the hell is my phone , its not funny. but since i was groggy my foolish groupmates managed to convinced me that maybe i was just sleepy and i did just forgot my phone at my house. so what i did is i texted my mother by the use of my friends phone to please check my desk if my phone happens to be there. then my mother replied a simple "no". so then i calmed myself and just forget about it maybe it was lost or something, and i didnt want that to destroy my day. but after a while my mother then texted my friend asking me if i happen to remember the ride i took to go to school and i said "yes , the ride happens to park always near the bus station" and those tricycles who parks on the bus stations happens to be not-numerous. thus you will be able to distinguished by asking one-by-one who happens to took a nursing student early in the morning for school. on the other side of the story, i was then at a ride going to the hospital and while on the ride, they gave me my phone and they all laugh, but since im pissed with what they did i just shut-up and shut my phone of.i didnt even managed to inform my mother that i have found my phone .

i can compare the place where we resides as a resemblance of springfield, where Homer Simpson lives, every body always knew every little microscopic issue that should only remain in he house.

so whats the hitch? my mother which closely resemble marge simpson with hypertrophic tounge happens to locate the driver who took me to school. and you know the usual confrontation scene that always happen in Philippine road crossings, happens in actual, complete with barangay tanod, and barangay captain. and off course . they found nothing

after a very toxic day at school, i was shocked that a huge crowd was waiting for me at the front lounge of my house. and the rest was history, ja3.

the most toxic day in my nursing life

its 11:52 of the evening ,so allow me to cut the cutie-ditzy.

i just want to shout through the infinite world of the internet how rough this night was......

i knew from the time i awaken my soul , and open my eyes that this god-forbidden day would be rough. i dont know how to explain it but i really can feel through my stomach the beat of my heart, and words attack my mind, i worried and took a deep inhalation, and as soon as i get up on my bed, i said to myself, "oh bitch, there's something wrong"

and as i was expecting it. i was right.

i was shot through my hypothalamus with sharp words that could kill a herd when released through the mouth of the devils.

" gago"

"tanga"

"duldog"

"bobo"

"abnormal"

if i was a normal teenager nursing wannabe , i could have broke down and cry, thank god i wasn't born normal. i have high tolerance with bad degrading words which i developed along the way as my journey in my nursing school progresses. my right ears tends to adopt all the sharp stabbing words like treasures , while my left ear tends to dispose it like dollars.

it is safe to say that this night was one of the most toxic night ever in my life, so far.

thank god to my sunny personality and optimistic life approach, my brain automatically deletes all the hatred on my heart every after taking a bath and having a bite of fried chicken.

all i can say to my classmates is: you bitches i will be richer than all of you, and you'll kiss my dirty little ass

and to my C.I : well I, John Bryan Cristobal, BSN-IV-A , do thank you for all the degrading words you said to me, i swear to the almighty that i would use those words as my inspiration in life for me to be a better nurse. NO. for me to be a great nurse. a great nurse that will take care of you at the hospital when your sick,or to old that you cant even walk and clean your poops .

then you'll thank me for listening to you. i promised i'll be respectful and will reply:

"no problem dude , i wont let my anger engulf me, im to rich to bother"

thank you sir.

7 foolish reasons

while eating lunch along with a close friend and two semi-stranger classmates, i obviously felt that the last two are feeling a little bit o.p because they cant keep up with me and my friend rampant chit-chat .we are really intimidating. so what i did is that i talk to them, ya know some random stuff about school, their lives, and some sort of lovelife, and as i was expecting , it backfired to me and slap me in my face.

i was shot direct through my heart: " bakit wala ka pang boypren?"

and i really dont know what to say, i swear i just stare both on their faces with a pokerface while my mouth open still with un-masticated pork.i promise if i dont have a well sanity i could have hit that girl right through her face.

so how should i disect this, i dont really know why. but i have few good reasons why.

1.well because im tall, dark, and.......nevermind. what i just meant is that. you know it...... should i still type it..... lets just make it this way. im the last person god created and he was so tired that time.

2. i dont know who should approach first . cause the only rule i knew is "guys should make the first move" and i guessed that isn't so applicable to my situation.

3. i know im gay, but seriously?, should i really put a dick on my mouth? dude, grow up. i aint gonna do that. gross

4. im a guy, technically, and millions of testosterone is floating in my blood. im not gonna swallow your sons and daughters. as i said i have millions of it.i don't need additional cause it might transform me into a gay hulk. uh uh.

5. guys who want dickos are gays, and guys who want their dickos into a guys mouth is gayoh. its a gayoh-gayoh love affair.in other term. a lose-lose situation, ek bankrupt.

6.this might hurt others, but. we are guys, gayguy, and we have a diko not a vagina. and real men digs vagina and not asshole.according to my last research sex-change ranges from 3000-10000 dollars roughly 138000-500000 pesos. go ahead cut your pride.

7. this is the most serious answer i can come up with.

guys dont like me. and i dont like guys, yet. i dont want to push myself on something i dont like cause i dont want to end up regretting.

Publish Post

a post ( at long last)

ok fine, i really dont know how i was able to find my dignity again to post a new entry on this so called "haunted-blog". to set the record, i was really(really) busy this past few months (i swear to you blog). but who cares right ? , as far as i know there is only 3 active person reading my post, thats my friend, another friend , and I. jaja.

anyways to start this of; i want to say ! hella IM NOW A SENIOR!

oh hell yah! im almost there. I can see myself crossing the bridge from being a student nurse to a millionaire. seriously.

i couldn't imagine how fast time is. i could still remember myself being a freshman , and now im the bully, i mean a senior who happens to be a bully. but i wasnt a bully when i was a junior cause i know that I still have higher years to look up to. but now that i know that theres no more kuya and ate to respect, I can now rock the catwalk. jaja. anyways alongside with my jolliness about being a senior i still have a lot of problem going on in my head:

MY TOP PROBLEMS AS OF NOW

1. i still havent completed all my major surg.

2. i havent experience a duty to the delivery room yet ( whats wrong with my school?)

3. i still doesnt a hike with my allowance

4.im bothered with my new terror C.I

5. i dont know what to wear at the incoming social acquintance

6. LOTS and LOTS of EXAM

7. my nostrils are irritated with hospital smell(stinks)

MY FUTURE PROBLEM 's

1. board exam( cross fingers)

2. IELTS( cross fingers)

3.WORK, i dont want to work in the hospital (please,i hate the smell)

4. money, A LOT OF MONEY

5. (this should be no. 1) graduation, i hate family events

6. living alone(i dont know how to do the laundry)

7. why the hell is breaking-dawn cut into two movie?

some clarification,for those who care about me please read this( ugh, im touch)

and for those who dont care, go back to watching porn.

1st problem: graduation , hell, graduation or any other events always drag my relatives at the house and they always call for celebration. well they really like having fun, so do i , its just that i really dont like family gathering, i dont know why, lets just set it that way. period.

2nd problem: work, hell yeh its really disturbing cause im a nursing student and i dont want to work at the hospital, im really serious, i dont know i just dont like the atmosphere of hospital, i dont like the aura of dying people, the smell(really stinks). i dont know. but hey you might ask , how about when im having duty at the hospital, well i just take a deep breath and a bulk of energy drinks, holding in my mind the phrase: "shut up bitch, just do it, thinks about the dollars".

maybe i could work as an instructor or a private nurse or a clinic nurse, im not sure ( but cross fingers)

- im also considering working at a psychological-ward hospital. you might find it weird but psych ward is the only place where i have in mind : this is fun land bitches.

huh , fingers are aching now, tired of typing. thats it for now.

im not sure when to post an entry again, but i hope soon.

misels

tawagin nyo na akong maarte ,pero ayoko ng bumalik sa manila.
tawagin nyo na akong nurse, pero ayoko na talagang bumalik sa manila.
ayain nyo man akong mag-MOA, ayoko na talagang bumalik sa manila.
bigyan nyo man ako ng unong grado , sa inyo na! , ayoko na talagang bumalik sa manila
putang ina! , maarte na kung maarte, ayoko talagang pumuntang manila!
anak ng tokwa bakit ba kasi hindi pa ako nagka-ka-measles eh. putangina talaga.
ayoko talaga, hindi ko kayang tumungtung sa san lazaro. ayoko talaga.(magkakamatayan tayo)
takowt ako eh. takowt na takowt!
hindi ko yata kayang mag-maintenance ng balot,lipovitan at sting. (patay talaga ako nito XD ) tsk tsk.

eureka booster

this week, i've been into a quite bumpy ride.the worst moment for me this week happened last,,,, hmmmp when was that? I guessed that was yesterday. i was on duty (night shift) at the E.R. its been a long time since i landed at the E.R, and to hell my luck flew out. my first patient past away (patay), that girl was really out of her mind, just the fact that she was nineteen, with two child, and she killed herself. whew, she might have been regretting why she did that cause she had lost an her chance to taste gulps.kidding aside, that much-miss experience killed my eureka to eat my favorite tapsilog(at night).

and for my best moment of the week, hmmp let me recall when was that?.......that was also yesterday. that was during our dinner break. ganito kasi yun(tagalog version)

ako: (habang kumakain ng tapsilog) kayo tagala ako na naman ang ginawang example sa bipolar disorder. palagi nalang ako, ako ,ako.

Friend1: eh ganyan talaga, ganyan ka eh.

ako: ellow?tama na sana yung isa, pero tama bang ako na ang example ng bipolar, ako na yung example ng schizo , ako na ang exaple ng autistic , pati ba naman sa pagiging manyak ako parin?(nguya ng nguya ng tapsilog)

Friend2: ganyan talaga, ang ibig sabihin lang nun eh napapansin ka namin, ikaw yung center, ibig sabihin nun love ka namin.

ako: (nguya ng nguya ng tapsilog habang nagblublush)

that conversation was totally awesome.

RE: bakit hindi ako nag-fa-farmtown

habang nag-blo-blog-hop ako,may nabanga akong blog (http://caracasniabe.blogspot.com) so binasa-basa ko yung mga post ni kuya na nakaka-aliw, hanggang sa may nag-pakinang sa aking mga cute na mata , isang post ni kuya , ang title:Bakit Wala Akong Farmville?
hindi ko alam pero sobrang nakarelate ako kay kuya, ang tangging kaibahan lang namin ay meron akong facebook account ang kaso zero ang friends ko, bakit? wala lang.

eh kasi naman ginagamit ko lang yung account na yun para iview at icopy yung mga picture ng mga kleyente ko (actually yung mga kaibigan ko lang ) para sa aking mga picture editting projects.

isa pang pagkakapareho namin ng kuyang yun ay: ang hindi ko pagka-karelate sa mga kaibigan ku tuwing recess , nagmimistulang alien ako tuwing pinagkwe-kwentuhan nila kung gaanu na kalawak ang kanilang mga hacienda.

oo, naiintindihan ko na inutus ni madam gloria na magtanim tayo para maiwasan ang globbal warming, oo, nagtanim nga kayo , sa farmtown naman. ano kaya yun.

random thoughts

1.yesterday I realized i was in like with somebody, after about five hours i regretted, then I realized i was not in like.

2. yesterday morning . i resemble myself with wolverine, a gay version , that's why i get a haircut

3. yesterday night. i unfortunately got the weirdest patient ever, he even suspected me as a vampire.

4. yesternay night(late night) , i was able to watch percy jackson , aside from the guy looking like chase crawford (hot!) , everything was pure juvenile.

5. today(Dawn) - i was able to download P-VS-Z. i am totally addicted
6. today(lunch-almost)- i was informed i flank my oxy. concept, i jerk a tear.i didnt ate lunch. then i drunk bunch of chocolate drink for a bulk of endorphines , then i laughed a lot.-im not over it yet, but im almost there (love story?)

7. today(right now) - i am typing this post

8. later- i'll be reviewing my last school concept, okey fine- ill be playing P-VS-Z

9. i notice my letter "O" in my keyboard is totally jerked.

napagTANTU at ang bagong logo

habang hinihintay na matuyu ang tina na inaplay ng kamag-anak ko sa buhuk ko naisipan kung iopen ang blog ko, pangalawang beses ko ng inopen ang blog kong to ngayong araw, una nung ipinost ko yung mga litrato na pina-EDIT sa akin ni sasha and majoy. sa pangalawang beses naisipan kung magblog-hop at baka sakaling may mabangga akong blog na interesting at meron nga. habang binabasa ko ang mga post niya napagtantu ku na enjoy naman pala ang isang blog kahit kakaunti lang ang mga litrato na nakapost at kahit nasa wikang tagalog lang . hindi ko alam at parang tinamaan yata ako ng inggit sa lalakeng may-ari ng blog nayun. habang iniisip ku kung pwede ko kung ano ang sunod kung gagawin inopen ku muna yung blog ko. nang makita ko ang blog ko na puro larawan ang laman. napagtantu ko na parang wala ng substance ang blog ko(actually wala na talaga), na realize ku rin na hindi ko dapat ilimit ang sarili ko sa pictures ,dapat may laman din. na realize ko din na hindi naman pala corny ang tagalog ,nasa nagsusulat lang yan,keri lang. kaya naman napagdesisyonan ko kasama ng laptop ko na simula sa araw na to ang blog na ito ay mananatili paring isang photo blog,with substance nga lang.

ayus ba.?

bukod pa dyan . gusto ko ring ipakita ang otentic patent ng blog ko. ayan siya nasa
baba o.ayus ba

JBX 2 & 3

Jx1

i hope you like it...nyahahaha

well said i guess, hope to share some love with yah people!!

my eyes has fangs.

the picture speaks for itself

pebrero bente-tres

ganyan ako kaliit pag kausap ko si tyra banks

this one is pretty cool , though its a bit dirty knowing that this one is only an experiment. It really reminds me of archie the comic character. eh?

vote for ME!

Is he your next president?

moi recent photo edit

mahal ko talaga ang glee - adik ako

is the love bug lost?

okey ,im gay, this is the 100th time i posted that line on my blog, ya know just to clear things up. Im gay , Im nineteen and im officially single since when?- when my mother blew me out. that was not a disgusting fact at all, or maybe i just got used to it, ya know the word "immunity" . but then again the hearts month is back again and it makes me feel "unloved" again. february is the worst month the sweet mother of god have created and valentines is the worst word that ever landed on the dictionary. is the hatred very obvious? ohkay fine hatred is not the word maybe jealousy. ill admit it. im jealous to angelina that she have brad pitt, im jealous with edward that he have bella and bella have jacob, im jealous to everybody who have someone to gigle with love and hugs. why cant someone publish a loveless-friendly calendar where february is totally erased. ugh that little chubby stupid creature namely cupid will hugely pay a lot to me. is the lovebug dead or Was it confuse on the way to me and gets lost . why cant that lovebug bite me, im offering myself to be bitten, heller!.
okay , maybe im to overreacting, cause obviously im not the only "gay" in the world and not all "gay" are single some have what they so called "partners". maybe its not my time. maybe its not really meant to be. i really dont have any idea right now. but all i know is that its valentines again and im still single. gosh that sounds so awfull

moi presidential vote

obviously my presidential bet is NOYNOY .i really dont have any idea . but i kinda like his breed.

is destiny beyond beyonce?

ive been gay for as long as the earth started to turn.
though i dont want to be gay, i really could not do anything cause that is where all my nerves pops out. i cant and i wont go beyond my destiny, if my blood wants to be gay and so be it. but hey my life is not like a chocolate always stored on a pale box tied in a red ribbon appealing to be so optimistic and shouts "hey! buy me ! buy me!. i have a penis and yes i have a penis- oh com'on i do want to have a son and call it "junior" though that would sound so gay.
Having a penis is so disgusting, i hate the way it dangles when i wore my bacons, i hate the way it itch, the way my skinny jeans bulge,the feeling of early morning toast.it all sucks - my penis sucks!. but i either dont like having a vagina,why? well aside fron the reason that it bleeds to often, it also looks like a calla lily with certain cactus in between uh.......So i hate vaginas and im afraid of them that leaves me with no choice than to work with my .....Penis. on a brighter side i find my penis well enough....that an awkward statement,erase that on your mind.

the truth is female wants sex as much as men does

thats a pretty line from the u.s tv series glee.the awful thing is they did not include us.

then allow me to rephrase that.

the truth is female and gay wants sex to as much as men and lesbians does

that is much better.

so I do want to be "productive" with my penis, it is still a god-given-"gift" and i need to use it - for good.as what i have written above,seriously i do want to have a child it would not be to particular either it would be a girl or a boy.so the problem would arise here.I want to have a child , but im afraid of vagina.....and how is that? how would that be?.....hmmm i think i would be able to decide when i crossed the bridge. but im considering artificial insemination , divertional activities, getting drunk , barbiturates , and well..... enjoying it.

a cholera infected brain

i do posses enough(few) emotions and standards on a typical day ,but that doesnt make me autistic or whatever, dont get me wrong, cause i really dont have anything with being autistic . but mostly i ravage my nerve by gathering drastic opinion about how sure i am about my equilibrium,pertaining absolutely on my mentality.

well....
basing on my past experiences Ive done enough weird things that could give me the license to claim my Mr. autistic sash.

ahhm... the most embarrassing that i could remember was when i dance on the middle of a department store as my bodies response to a lavish song. and take note that was 50% off sale day - a bunch of people was there.(agh!)

and currently I was on duty at the operating room. i really didnt take my breakfast that day but i was really am very excited to go on duty . the climax- i almost touch every inch of unsterilized materials . why cause i almost lost my mind due naussea and the result i was sent out.(this was so embarrassing).

actually i really cannot remember all the stupidity ive done. but i do consider the fact that i might be infected by cholera just like edward cullen.

my late early post

ive been really diffused for the last present week of the month.why?
cause seriously ive been busy roaming the big city- nope not new york, i mean Manila.
ive stayed there for the past two weeks and i really seriously doesn't have time to visit the net and post a blog .

and what the hell did i do over the city?
-well aside from i waste time providing free service at a certain hospital, i hilariously raid divisoria . ive spent 3 rocking days actually 4 going 168, tutuban and sidewalks- it was pure heaven for prices , and pure trash on its smell. good thing i have sipon that week.

anyways just posted to say" hey! im still alive"
anyways 2- ive started to read breaking dawn - and currently on chapter 5.